by Konstandina Poly
To be in a magical relationship is a journey and the goal is every moment of the relationship.
It is not about being in a constant state of perfection. It is about being in a constant flow of creation and exploration.
To be in a magical relationship is about two individual journeys of self knowledge and fulfillment that are coming together to enhance each other and to become one.
When you are experiencing a magical relationship you know it.
And if you are not, you can create it.
So, these are 10 elements of a magical relationship as I know it:
1. Ecstatic sex:
Connecting sexually with your lover feels like your boundaries dissolve, you are completely harmonised, your pleasure becomes his pleasure and his emotions become yours.
It feels like dancing the song of your souls’ meeting, a song that only you can hear, a dance that only you can experience, an ecstasy that brings you closer to the core of existence.
You are letting go of the facades, the insecurities and false securities and you dive deep into the pure, naked connection of your beings.
2. Dream world connection:
You are exploring your lover’s unconscious and he is connecting with yours. You meet each other in your dreamscape, you get to know each other’s deepest secrets, how you make sense of the world, what your biggest dreams are and what you are deeply afraid of.
3. Deeply fulfilling conversations:
Communicating with your lover isn’t jus a necessity, it’s actually a blissful delight. Your communication is flowing like a river taking all your troubles, stresses and pains with it towards the ocean.
You could stay up all night talking about every single thought, feeling, dream, desire and experience you have ever had!
Sharing your new realisations, questions, experiences and aspirations is what you love to do. You feel like there is a constant conversation going on between you and him even when he is not physically present.
4. No doubt about your love:
The love flowing between the both of you is so evident and powerful, there is no room for doubts to emerge about this being love or not, about the other being the right person or not, about the feelings being mutual or the giving reciprocal. There is no doubt.
You do not need to beg him for traces of reassurance and keep asking him about how he really feels for you.
Your whole body and soul will hear a quiet and powerful voice, still and steady like a mountain, telling you that he loves you.
5. You feel it is forever:
Yes, forever exists. It is not a religious or political contract. It is not a concept with no applicability. It is not a superficial fairy tale kind of idea.
It is a feeling. You can feel forever through your whole being.
You want to share the rest of your breathing time, with this form and on this earth, with him. And he does, too.
And yet, there is a painful paradox that comes with this forever. It does last for a life time, but a life time is never enough.
You wonder if maybe soul contracts for future lives exist and maybe that can provide some comfort. You are experiencing the bitter sweet phenomenon of having what you deeply desire while you are just human.
6. You trust:
You are an acrobat letting go of the rope knowing that your lover will catch you.
You both train everyday in the art of balance, strength and flexibility. You both inspire a feeling of trust to each other.
You know it is difficult to trust, to extend your hands to him to catch you when you jump with no guarantee that he will. Every time an act of courage and a cultivation of pure heart.
You know it is not easy to trust that you will catch him when he surrenders to you and places his hopes on you. But you are working on this, every day letting go a bit more, every day trusting a bit more.
7. You both bring forth and accept the other’s darkness:
No one is only light or only darkness. No one has only successes or only failures. No one has only strengths or only sensitivities. You know that, and you know that you want this person to be your lover with all their wonderful parts and all the parts they want to hide from themselves and the world.
You would not replace his sensitivities with any strengths, as they are part of him and you love him as a whole. And he loves all the bits of yourself you are ashamed of.
8. You call your lover’s Big Dreams into creation:
That feeling deep inside that moves, motivates and makes you feel alive is well known to him. He invokes it.
When the false voices of societal rules, friends and family expectations call you for emotional imprisonment, he will call you back into yourself. He will call you back home.
And when he needs to take some risks, to be closer to nature, to express himself shamelessly; You are there to feed his fire and watch it burn full of wildly creative power.
9. You feel each other’s feelings:
To not support each other is out of question. Turning away from his pain is like turning away from your pain.
His empathy for you is like a magical balm that you put on your heart and where there was only sadness or anxiety, suddenly there is hope.
It feels like a ray of sun light when you’re opening the door of a dark room.
Your empathy for him is like a warm blanket where he can rest, and cry, and laugh, and know that everything will be ok at the end.
10. Your life together is a playground:
Wonder, fun, laughter and joy are here to stay.
The excitement of looking at life with the eyes of a child, a wondering dervish or perhaps a philosopher from an other time and space reality.
For both of you being full of wonder and aliveness is the only way worth living.
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About the Author:
Konstandina Poly. is a Psychologist, Relationship Counsellor and Dating Coach. She also works as a Mindfulness, Magical and Shamanic Meditations Facilitator. She holds a BA in Psychology and a Postgraduare Diploma in Counselling Psychology. Konstandina has been in the mind and spirit healing field for the last 16 years. You can connect with her on facebook, visit her website www.konstantflow.com, or email her on firstname.lastname@example.org to book your initial consultation and to sign up for her inspiring newsletter.
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