by Sequoia Erato
Ahhhhh, love magick.
The kind that has so many of us hovered around a cauldron on a Friday night in a pile of rose petals, strawberry oil, surrounded by pink and red candles, scribbling out Venus sigils and writing out a long list of all the amazing qualities we want in a partner.
We write what s/he looks like, smells like, feels like, sounds like, tastes like.
We write how they would act, how they would treat us, what kind of work they do, hobbies they enjoy, values and quirks.
The list is so detailed, so intricate, that the Universe is wondering how it’s going to fit all of these things into one human!
There are some of us who may even have one specific person in mind, adding a few tears to the cauldron, begging the Goddess to just return what is rightfully ours!
What if the answer to true, powerful, and ethical love magick wasn’t in calling someone into our lives, per se, not in attracting some external person to us, but accessing something that we carry innately within ourselves?
What if we cast the love spell on ourselves instead?
The truth is when we are doing love magick, more often than not what we are seeking is that authentic, soul-flowering, expansive, twin flame, always and forever kind of love.
I mean, that’s what brought us to such extents in the first place. A part-time lover is fairly easy to find. That’s usually not what the heart truly wants.
I’m here to declare that the radiantly romantic, head over heels, blissfully ecstatic love can absolutely exist for each one of us in any moment! The best part is it truly is ever-lasting, unconditional and will never, ever leave our side.
I’m talking about falling in love with ourselves and the power of harnessing our love magick in a way that serves our highest good. Oh yes, and we can totally make love to ourselves as well.
We can still bring out all the rose quartz and oils and candles on a Friday night, but instead of writing out a list of all the things we want in someone else, why don’t we try writing a list of all of the incredible qualities we want to develop within ourselves?
We are, after all, reflections. What we create in ourselves is what we are without a doubt bound to attract in another person at some point, in divine timing, when we are truly ready and centered in our own self-love.
We can make a vow to love ourselves no matter what.
We can definitely still call upon our guides and God/dess for assistance. Typically, in spell work, some kind of invocation is involved to call in the divine for added support.
If we would like to develop qualities such as confidence in romance, sensuality, radiance, we may choose to invoke the Goddess Aphrodite or Venus and ask her for wisdom in embodying such beauty as she does.
If we want to become more bold, wild and adventurous in our love, we may call upon the Norse Goddess Freya for assistance.
For a more stable, committed and balanced kind of love, we may ask Frigga for guidance in awakening this within ourselves.
Men may call upon Pan to awaken the wild masculine sensuality in themselves.
They don’t have to be just love God(desse)s either but there may be a quality that we really want to cultivate in ourselves and haven’t been able to so far but would drastically increase our sense of self-love. Angels are always there to help as well.
This is where magick overlaps into Tantra as well.
Tantra teaches us how to be fully empowered in our heart, mind, body and sexuality.
It involves practices in which we cultivate profound self-love, trust, and acceptance, that we may move throughout our lives and interactions always from a heart space.
It teaches us to love others at a soul level, and especially ourselves, as well as to harness the energy of love and sexuality to reach greater states of conscious awareness.
Tantra is basically a form of love magick.
We learn to love all of ourselves fully, even the darkness, the shadow, the parts that we often assume are unlovable to another person.
Now the importance here is that through this tantric lens we can see love magick in a different way; shifting the focus from grasping for something external and towards blossoming into our truest essence within.
Only when we truly fall in love with ourselves, can we truly fall in love with someone else.
I’m here to share, having spent so many years as an incurable romantic, grasping for love any time it gave a vague resemblance (and even when it didn’t!), that it is absolutely possible to cultivate a completely fulfilling love affair with ourselves!
And sure, it is more likely than ever that with such a high level of self confidence, radiance and joy in just being, that Mr. or Mrs. Right will stroll right into our lives anyway.
The point is not to expect it, but to be enthralled with life’s mystery and enamored by our own presence.
Then it will be Friday night love spells, making love and magick together, two beings who are entirely whole and complete within themselves.
And then, if somehow that is still not Mr. or Mrs. Right, it doesn’t even matter, because you always and forever have the infinite unconditional love that exists within you!
Ahhhhh yes, that is real love magick.
If this essay resonates with you, please join our WITCH email list by using the forms on this website so we can stay in touch.
About the Author:
Sequoia Erato (born Sarah Dobbin) is a writer, healer, ritual and meditation facilitator and practitioner of the magickal and tantric arts. Having spent many years traveling in South America she has studied shamanism, yoga, and bhakti as well. She is currently an adept at the Modern Mystery School, training in the lineage of King Salomon. Through past life ceremonies, active practice and study, listening to her guides and intuition, she has come to awaken her inner tantric witch. She is the founder of Etched in Sequoia and manages her blog The Love Cauldron. You can follow her on Facebook and Instagram.
featured image source