by Sequoia Starr
You are not welcome here, cock-eyed carrier of conditioned untruths. You are not welcome in the sacred lair of my inner sanctum.
For so long I loved you in the most twisted way, blinded by your manipulative games and sorrowful symmetry.
You are a trickster with your thick veil relentlessly shading the window of my inner sight.
How many years I have spent sounding urgent bells when you woke me in the middle of the night claiming emergency.
Somehow, I even believed you were my friend, my lover. It felt comfortable to lay in your arms solemn and unaware, to believe just as I had been told, that my innocent seeking was wrong.
I banish you from my sacred temple, and especially my womb space.
You will no longer enter uninvited into my most beloved moments of union with a partner and with my self. They are not yours to claim.
You who carry the voices of a patriarchal society and its mirrored upbringing and you who are doused with confused and contaminated energies which blur the understanding of right and wrong…if there ever was such a thing.
You who numbs pleasure and you who whispers lack and submit and slut and ugly and unworthy and follow the others and this way is better… You who drips dependency and inferiority.
You are not welcome to wander aimlessly through my body, blocking the quiet reaches of my treasured love and excreting your bastardized sacraments.
You who speaks as if all-knowing and yet quite insecure, of superiority and institutions marked righteous.
You cannot fool me with your many religious masks, your toxic weapons and your custom fit uniform.
I see you just sitting there watching like a grimy gargoyle, eyes wide and black with the darkness of designated and tainted youth.
Lurking invasive, your shadow haunts but with this ghastly surge of long overdue confrontation.
Rise then, for I know you hide like a hoarder repressing all of my condemned desires deemed not sacred by the masses.
I will no longer medicate to escape you.
For how deeply you have penetrated with your plague, like the densest of all human illness, in through blood and bone and DNA.
This is why I invoke you now, in your poison yes, and I am the alchemist.
I breathe compassion over you and forgiveness through you, for it is what you least expect.
I gift you with gratitude for all that you have taught me and acknowledge that in the darkest hours I have spent with you, I found a light brighter than both sun and moon.
I thank you for your teachings and I claim my sovereignty. I claim my magick as a birthright. I am here to say, no more.
Though I know your death may be a long process, I celebrate that with patience and with each confrontation I move closer to my soul’s greatest truth.
I want you to know with both fierce power and humility that I am safe and at home in my beautiful body, perfect in its unique expression and in its most organic state.
It is okay for me to feel confident and worthy, strong and willful, orgasmic and empowered.
It is okay for me to feel my many emotions and sensations because I am a divine human being moving through constant change and growth.
It is okay for me to receive money for my offerings because I am worthy of prosperity.
It is okay for me to not only have sex but to have transcendental sex which tastes like heaven because that is the energy which creates worlds.
It is okay for me to pray to the expression of the divine which feels true in my heart.
It is safe for me to love. It is safe for me to focus. It is safe for me to thrive and create and to help others do the same.
It is necessary for me to listen to my inner voice and the voice of nature because although I forgive you, I will never trust you.
It is vital that I honor my boundaries.
I have every right to speak my truth and claim the gifts which inspire me onward into fulfilling my dreams.
So, I will dance in the radiant wonder of liberated form and venture always into the mystery of ancient echoes.
I will bathe in the sensual serenity of the sacred and sovereign waters of my mighty womb space.
I will stand bravely, if windblown, staff in hand and rooted in the heart where Sky and Earth meet.
I choose to honor myself and others and will no longer allow you to speak through me in condemnation.
I humbly bow by the Willow and watch the purity of potential as the veil lifts from my eyes.
My voice is my own.
My body is my own.
My mind is my own.
My soul is my own.
On behalf of all who resonate, thank you and I release you.
~ Sequoia
IN CONCLUSION
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